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Denver Health Food Characters

The Characters
The best thing about Health Food stores in Denver is the collection of weirdos that work and shop at them. They’re snobby and sweet, facial tatted and obese. From all walks of life this disparate tribe of characters share one common thread: they care a bit more about their diet then the rest of us. Are you a greenie weenie that’s new in town?  Here’s a breakdown of the Natural Food stores you ‘ll find around here. I hope you like stereotypes:

Fancy Mustache Guy
Your spot: Vitamin Cottage
Vitamin Cottage has strict standards to keep you healthy. No energy drinks and no conventional veggies  Of course they also sell plenty of junk food and caffeine.  Perfect, hypocracy is your middle name! You’re a raw vegan (except liquor and vintage boots) and a you’re not vaccinating your kids (you were fully vaccinated). You’re telling me chem-trails are going to give my kids autism with a cigarette hanging from your mouth?  I love you for that.
Your purchase:  Bulk cashew/ carob chip power bars.  Enough calories to feed you for a month.